The dull pouding rain
makes you lose your senses
endless repetition
enfolds and then cleanses
washing away at your tears and your sorrow
eroding, corroding the fears of tomorrow

walking through lightning
thunder and rain
memories are frightening
bringing old pain
but still moving forward, walking through it
i don't have to like it, not even a bit.

the surreality of thunder
makes nothing else matter
except the heart that was sundered
and the rains pitter patter
coming from all directions, here, and then gone
the sound washes over me, a thunderous song

I sit on your front step
almost at tears
getting colder and colder
with each of my fears
eventually, exhausted, i make it back home
unfortunately though, i am still completely alone.

Whenever i think of you;
It's in present tense
somehow
my mind
refuses to admit
what is concrete, inescapable.

I wish, i wish, i wish.
I wish i had to done this
that
told you how much you mean
to me

I have probably said, out loud
that you have passed away
maybe once.
Once.
in two and a half months.

I can hardly
believe
it's been
that long

Contact info, for you.
It's still in my phone
that piece of shit.

you were the only
person
i would ever call.
To hang out.

video games
magic

and

eventually

alchohol
drugs

I miss you man.